As I put together this latest installment of musical mainstays, the Christmas season is creeping up like Jeffrey Epstein on a private flight. Naturally, that has me pondering the musician who tops this list, because even he released a Christmas album. Yes, that guy. First of all, he’s Jewish… but apparently Hanukkah albums don’t exactly fly off the shelves unless your name is Adam Sandler. And secondly, this is the same man who kicked off his career by lecturing America on the evils of consumerism: “Advertising signs they con you / into thinking you’re the one.” But lo and behold, there he is decades later, crooning Christmas tunes like a grizzled department-store Santa with a harmonica.

And honestly, Dylan’s Christmas in the Heart shouldn’t shock anyone when you consider that since the early 2000s he’s popped up in ads for Victoria’s Secret (yes, really), Cadillac, Pepsi, Chrysler, IBM, and Apple. His music has also been used to sell everything from Budweiser to Kaiser Permanente. So if the greatest “truth to power” troubadour of all time has willingly become a Swiss Army knife for capitalism, then let this series stand as proof that I am not writing the “Fan-Boys & Fan-Girls Guide to Blind Loyalty.” This is about the songs – only the songs – and nothing but the songs (so help me God of Vinyl).

And while I’m at it, let’s talk about Holiday albums in general… WTF!? How many versions of “Silver Bells” and “White Christmas” must the universe endure? At last count, millions of these things sell every year, churned out by artists you’d never associate with jingle bells or Jesus: Twisted Sister, Bad Religion, The Killers, Insane Clown Posse—basically the Mount Rushmore of “Wait, what?!” They also make terrible Christmas gifts, because the moment someone unwraps one, it’s officially useless for the next eleven months. At least the Twisted Sister Christmas album works as a gag gift.

Basically, the whole concept feels like a humiliation ritual cooked up by record executives: “Hey, your last album didn’t sell so how about a Christmas record? Wear this Santa hat and try not to look too dejected.”

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BOB DYLAN (40 albums)

Dylan has been on what is officially called “The Never Ending Tour” since 1988, because apparently retirement is for people who didn’t write “Like a Rolling Stone.” I’ve never been to a Dylan concert myself, so I can neither confirm nor deny whether they’re wheeling the 84-year-old out onstage strapped to a dolly like weekend inventory at Costco.

And, much like the top artist from my last post, the bulk of his genius is front-loaded in the 1960s, when he was young, angry, unplugged, and writing lyrics sharp enough to shave with. Yet somehow, somebody out there – besides the “professional” critics who would praise Dylan for releasing a 45-minute album of dishwasher noises – is still buying these late-period records.

Something is happening here… but I truly don’t know what it is, Mr. Jones.

1960s – Bringing It All Back Home (1966)

1970s – Blood on the Tracks (1975)

1980s – Oh Mercy (1989)

1990s – Time Out of Mind (1997)

EXTRA CREDIT: The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan (1963), Highway 61 Revisited (1965), Blonde on Blonde (1966), Desire (1976)

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BEE GEES (22 albums)

This band climbed their way up with the patience of a monk and the persistence of a telemarketer, only to suddenly explode in the late ’70s like a thousand disco balls detonating at once. Then they plummeted back to earth faster than the Times Square ball drops on New Year’s Eve, except with much less confetti and far more polyester.

They made this list not because of any sustained brilliance in the ’80s and ’90s. No, they earned their spot the same way Dylan did: by front-loading their career with so much greatness that the back half could nap through the decades and no one would notice. With two of the brothers now gone, their legacy is locked in marble – glittery, falsetto-soaked marble – and nothing can touch it.

1960s – Bee Gees 1st (1967)

1970s – Main Course (1975)

1980s – One (1989)

1990s – Still Waters (1997)

EXTRA CREDIT: Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack (1977), Spirits Having Flown (1979)

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BOZ SCAGGS (20 albums)

The inclusion of this musician may shock anyone who wrote him off as a 70s flash-in-the-pan. But somehow, quietly and without asking anyone’s permission, he’s maintained a totally respectable career for decades.

Technically, he’s a one-hit wonder in the sense that every one of his chart moments happened in the back half of the 70s, and the charts haven’t returned his calls since. Yet he must have racked up some serious good karma back then, because he’s been carried by a fiercely loyal block of listeners who’ve stuck with him through every album, every tour, and every questionable fashion choice…all the way up to this blog entry in 2025, at the tender age of 81.

Not bad for a guy most people assume retired to Florida sometime around 1982.

1960s – Boz Scaggs (1969)

1970s – Silk Degrees (1976)

1980s – Middle Man (1980)

2010s – A Fool to Care (2015)

EXTRA CREDIT: Down Two Then Left (1977)

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BONNIE RAITT (18 albums)

It’s perfectly poetic that the final sample track for Boz Scaggs ends up being a duet with Bonnie Raitt. Bonnie’s rise to fame came later than Boz’s, not really exploding until the late ’80s, but don’t shed any tears for Ms. Raitt. She comes from excellent stock being a full-blown music-industry insider raised in a family of performers who also happen to be descendants of Scottish royalty. Yes, apparently Bonnie is blues royalty and actual royalty.

But crown or no crown, none of that changes the fact that she is one of the finest female blues guitarists in modern music history. And I only mention the “female” part because women who can absolutely torch a fretboard are still far too rare.

1970s – Give It Up (1972)

1980s – Nick of Time (1989)

1990s – Luck of the Draw (1991)

2010s – Slipstream (2012)

EXTRA CREDIT: Longing in Their Hearts (1994)

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BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN (21 albums)

Remember when George W. Bush told the Dixie Chicks to “shut up and sing”? As much as I’d prefer to pretend that entire era was just a fever dream caused by too much Axe body spray and freedom fries, I can’t say I totally disagreed with W. on that one point. Actually, scratch that…I wish all politicians would shut up and go away, preferably to a nice quiet farm where they can argue with scarecrows. But I digress.

Because here comes the real plot twist: as off-putting as Springsteen the public figure can be, between the Obama podcasts, the thoughtful political musings, and whatever New Jersey mysticism he’s currently dabbling in, there’s simply no denying Springsteen the musical legend. The man’s catalog is ironclad.

So, political cringes aside… here he is.

1970s – Born to Run (1975)

1980s – Tunnel of Love (1987)

1990s – The Ghost of Tom Joad (1995)

2000s – The Rising (2002)

EXTRA CREDIT: The Wild, the Innocent & the E Street Shuffle (1973), Darkness on the Edge of Town (1978), Nebraska (1982), Born in the U.S.A. (1984)

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BRYAN FERRY (16 albums)

Even though Bryan Ferry is best known as the velvet-voiced frontman of Roxy Music, he’s also spent decades cranking out a surprisingly large solo catalog, the kind of output that makes you wonder if he ever actually sleeps or just lounges eternally in a silk robe while humming into a martini glass.

I can’t say I’ve ever been a card-carrying member of the Ferry fan club – Roxy Music or solo – but you have to respect the man’s longevity. He’s basically a national treasure in Great Britain, where people apparently do talk about him at dinner parties. Meanwhile, here in the U.S., I have zero memory of anyone mentioning his music, recommending it, or even accidentally leaving one of his albums lying around. In fact, only one of his solo albums ever sold well in America, which honestly just proves he’s been running on pure British charm and artistic stubbornness for decades.

1970s – In Your Mind (1977)

1980s – Boys and Girls (1985)

1990s – Mamouna (1994)

2010s – Avonmore (2014)

EXTRA CREDIT: Let’s Stick Together (1976), Frantic (2002)

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BRUCE HORNSBY – (10 albums)

This is probably as close as I’ll ever get to including jazz on this blog, and only because Bruce Hornsby specializes in the user-friendly, “jazz-for-people-who-don’t-actually-like-jazz” variety. His music is smooth enough that my tolerance level remains unchallenged, and no berets or abstract saxophone solos are required.

Hornsby and his band blasted onto the scene with a debut album so strong it made the entire adult-contemporary world stand up, stretch, and say, “Well hello there!” But after that, he settled into a much quieter, under-the-radar groove, the musical equivalent of putting on comfortable shoes and refusing to apologize for it.

Much like Boz Scaggs, most casual music fans probably assume Hornsby retired sometime in the late ’90s and now lives exclusively on soft-rock radio royalty checks. But nope…he released a solo album as recently as 2022. And that’s just the way it is. (Some things will never change.)

1980s – The Way It Is (1986)

1990s – Spirit Trail (1998)

2000s – Big Swing Face (2002)

2010s – Absolute Zero (2019)

EXTRA CREDIT: Scenes from the Southside (1988), Harbor Lights (1993)

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BABYFACE (10 albums)

I’ve never fully understood the appeal of Babyface’s music, though to be fair, I’m not exactly the target demographic for whisper-soft lover-man serenades designed to melt the spines of half the population. His songs are so smooth they’re practically FDA-approved as a sleep aid, yet there’s an undeniable, velvety sophistication to the whole thing.

1980s – Tender Lover (1989)

1990s – For the Cool in You (1993)

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